Ok, lets get something out of the way right now. Regardless of where you go in life, you are the same person on the inside, therefore you will experience where ever you are, the same way.
Ie… You don’t find yourself out there, you find yourself in here.
Example: I’m going to go travel so I can feel free, I’m going away for the weekend , I’m staying at the perfect place, I’m quitting this job for something better, I’m leaving this “person/place/thing” to go to a better “person/place/thing” and then I will feel better.
Spoiler alert, any feeling better that something external provides you will be fleeting until you work on the internal.
Your “stuff” is with you wherever you go. Yes you might be happier in a job that values you more, in a bigger house with more light, or with a partner who treats you equally and it is really nice to go away for the weekend! That is all important. But as you may have realized, once you change the external, but you don’t do the work on the internal, the same reasons why you left that “not good enough situation” will start to seep back into you new situation.
Why do all these jobs I have leave me feeling depleted and resentful from over giving?
Why do I seem to attract a friend circle that always puts me down or makes me feel less than?
Why does every new partner of mine fail to make me feel like that inner goddess I know I am?
Why do I focus on all the things that I don’t like or could be better about this vacation instead of enjoying it in the present moment?
They may have different faces, different job titles, different locations, different attributes, but the pattern seems to be repeating…. something is “not good enough”. Something out there is to blame for my circumstances and I must keep looking for a better “something out there”.
I have experienced this my entire life, constantly seeking external validation for my internal sense of lack.
I have travelled far and wide, all over the globe, and I feel confident that I can bring you this message.
Nothing out there will bring you internal satisfaction.
You must look inside, you must look at the repeating patterns, you must sit with your feelings of discontent that is new person, place or thing brings up. You must take responsibility for your inner world. You must start to elevate your self from the victim consciousness we can all fall into. That is not the same was being an actual victim BTW.
Victim consciousness is when we think that the outside world has all the control. That we have no say in what happens to us. That we can be easily controlled and manipulated into giving our power away.
How does that look like….
“I have this great idea, I bring it to my boss/partner/friend, they don’t agree fully, so I kind of forget about..”
“I have this great idea, I get excited and then all my doubts come in, and I abandon it…”
“I have this great idea, I encounter some stumbling blocks on the way to executing it, and then I give up, eh it wasn’t that great anyways….”
Let’s take our power back. Let’s realize how powerful we are. Let’s not self abandon when things get tough or people disagree with us. Let’s start to realize that these outer situations in our life are calling us to evolve into the next layer of ourselves.
If we desire real, lasting, sustainable contentment it has to come from inside, regardless of where you are, what you are doing, or who you are doing it with.
How do you do this?
Next time you get those familiar uncomfortable feelings from an event in your life… ” jeez not again, my partners always make me feel *blank*… try and reframe it to this..
” What is my reaction to myself when I feel *blank*?”
Is it kind and caring? Or is it dismissive or mean?
What if I let whatever feelings are being evoked by this situation just be there? with out judgment?
What is I stopped judging myself as “bad or wrong, or broken and needing to be healed”
Questioning your habitual patterns will change you life.
Start where you are right now.
The present moment is where all of your power lies.