Accessing your inner knowing
Lot’s to discuss today, yesterday I was getting major downloads for where my business seems to be heading. To be honest this whole week has been one of growth and change, of fine tuning what I want to bring to the world, working through the blocks to believing that I actually can be of service to people, grieving past versions of myself, forgiving them and taking small actions steps forward.
It’s a lot, but I know I am heading in the right direction. I can feel the tingling sensations of fear and excitement in my body, it feels like my body is propelling me forward, even if my mind and it’s onslaught of doubts is like running behind me saying “hey what about this!” or “what about your, at times, crippling indecision”, “remember you can’t commit to things!” or the old fav “you?! HA yah right..”.. etc etc etc..
But something I have now learned to embody on the reg is realizing that these thoughts are not actually my truths, they are fear based, because we are growing, we are changing and we are evolving, all unfamiliar things the ego does not want.
Which leads me to today’s topic, your true self v. your real self.
This is a concept I heard first from Tara Branch, author of Radical Compassion, a beautiful person, and mediation instructor. Her mediations helped me through my second dark night of the soul last year. She talks about your soul’s truths, and how a situation in your life can be and feel very real, but is it your ultimate truth?
My current job is stressful and chaotic and my peers/bosses don’t seem to value me. Which makes me feel unhappy, unworthy and under appreciated.
Now ask yourself, is this real? Does my job make me feel those things? Yes.
But is this true? Is it the ultimate truth of my being that I am unhappy, unworthy and under appreciated. No.
I am not those things at my core, even if a real life situation is bringing them up in me. It can feel very real, it can indeed be your reality. But often it is not the truth of who you are.
You didn’t come to earth to embody unworthiness, to be treated badly and feel under valued.
But you may have come here to learn to value yourself, and that you truly are worthy of all your desires. And the way to deeply know that on a cellular level is to be put in situations that don’t value you, so you can realize ” I am not valued here, I am leaving this situation”, or ” I am learning to value myself regardless of the opinions or situations in my external world”.
One of my favorite quotes goes something like this…
“the universe will deliver the message to you in either a feather light tap on your shoulder, or a wrecking ball to your life, depending on how willing you are to hear it”.
In short, if you don’t listen to the subtle voice of your intuition, the red flags, the synchronisities going on around you of why you should or should not do something, the universe will send another, more pressing situation with the same message. It will keep doing that until you stop, listen, and look at the underlying patterns of these repeating situations. Extract the wisdom from these wounds, and move forward with it.
Your true self will thank you.